Moving into a new place is always a challenge. A new space is a blank canvas, and it can take a while to get it looking the way you would like. And, that’s when you only have yourself to please.
When you move in with a partner, finding the perfect space and style becomes even harder. In addition to finding and maintaining a consistent interior design theme, is aligning it with that of your significant others.
It may be that you’ve been together a while and think you know each other well. But as the old adage goes, you can never fully know a person until you’ve lived together for a while.
In all your months or years of dating, there are many aspects that are important regarding at home preferences that just haven’t come up yet (speaking beyond just style!)
If you’re in the beginning stages of contemplating cohabitating, now is the time to have those important conversations.
Below is a list of things to help you move towards a harmonious living arrangement:
Stay On The Same Page During The House Hunt
Before you contemplate decor, you’re going to consider which type of place suits you both.
Apartment and house hunting together can be tough, especially as you have yet to live together. You’ll have no idea of what your partner looks for. That’s why it’s essential you take the time to talk about what you’re after. It’s the only way to stay on the same page.
Talk about whether you want a house, or would rather look out for an apartment. Bear in mind that compromise is essential here, and throughout the entire process.
If you both want different things, could you settle in the middle with something like a condo? A private unit much like an apartment, but offer the private benefits of a house. Something like this is the best of both worlds and allows you each to have your core parts of your preferences satiated.
Make sure to attend house viewings together. If you fall in love with a property when viewing without your partner, you’re sure to be in for a disappointment.
If you view together, you can gauge ideas of what each other is thinking. If you can see he or she doesn’t like it, you can stop yourself falling head over heels, and vice versa.
Working with a realtor also helps. When Dan and I began planning our first steps, we shared listing with each other (many of the time sending each other the same links, a good sign!)
Finally, we got a realtor who arranged our showing and answered all of our questions. While this is atypical, we left our first viewing and looked at each other in excitement at how much we wanted that place, together.
In a little over one month, we move in!
Find Common Themes In Your Belongings
Once you’re in, the hard work starts. This is when you’ll have to tackle the difficult decisions of joint decor. In the past, the woman may have made all the choices in the home but that’s far from the case these days.
Now cohabitating is all about finding a style which suits you both. If you’re starting from scratch, it may be worth looking for help from what you already have.
A person’s belongings say a lot about their style. Once you’re in and unpacked, you’ll be able to compare your belongings side by side. Take the time to look for common themes in what you own. Do you both have a clothing rack rather than a wardrobe?
This may be a sign that a minimal style will suit your needs. Or, perhaps there are similar colors throughout your clothes? It may be worth focusing on these when painting your walls.
Finding common themes like these may seem like clutching at straws, but it’s the best chance you have to start with. Even if you only gain small inspiration through doing this, it’s a step worth taking.
Make Decor Choices Together
We’ve already spoken about why house hunting together is necessary and making decor decisions together is just as important. Don’t rush off to decor boutiques and spend a fortune on paint your partner hasn’t agreed to. It’s a waste of money, and could again lead to disappointment.
Instead, stick together every step of the way. Look through home decor magazines together and place post-it notes on styles which appeal. Color code them so that you can see who liked what, then go back through together and explain your choices. It may be that you can find a way to conjoin a few aspects of the designs chosen. Make sure, too, to go decor shopping together. It’s the only way to ensure every purchase is worth making.
Color code them so that you can see who liked what, then go back through together and talk about your choices. It may be that you can find a way to conjoin a few aspects of the designs chosen. Make sure to go decor browsing (and shopping) together. It’s the only way to ensure every purchase is worth making.
It may also be worth undertaking the decoration process itself together. That’s not to say you should decorate the same room at the same time. That’s a sure way to arguments! But, why don’t you each take a different room? By this stage, you should have already outlined your main design ideas. The decoration is simply a process of applying what you’ve already agreed. The reason you should both take part is that decorating a room is the best way to make it your own. If one of you tackles the whole house, the other person may feel pushed out. Even if they agreed on the style, putting their mark on it is important.
By this stage, you should have already outlined your main design ideas. The decoration is simply a process of applying what you’ve already agreed. The reason you should both take part is that decorating a room is the best way to make it your own.
Make Space For Each Other
As you decorate and buy furniture, it’s also important to make space for your significant other. If you’ve gone from living alone to living together, this is crucial. If your belongings fill all the drawers, your partner may enter panic mode. To avoid that eventuality, consider each other’s needs with each piece of furniture you buy. Make sure there’s plenty of storage space for the both of you. Make sure, too, that you choose uses for your rooms meet which both of your needs. If he wants a study, set one aside. If you’re after a library, make sure there’s room for that, too. Having your own spaces like this is crucial. You’ll be able to escape there when you need some time alone. And, no matter how in love we are, we all need that from time to time.
If your belongings fill all the drawers, your partner may enter panic mode. To avoid that eventuality, consider each other’s needs with each piece of furniture you buy. Make sure there’s plenty of storage space for the both of you. Make sure, too, that you choose uses for your rooms meet which both of your needs.
For Dan and I, his office is the kitchen so that was a main priority. For me, I wanted lots of light, an in unit washer/dryer, and potentially some outdoor space (we have a private roof deck!)
If he wants a home office, work together to accommodate even if it doubles in the evening as your shoe closet along one wall. If a home gym is important to you, make sure there’s room for that, too.
Having your own spaces like this is crucial. You’ll be able to have some me-time there when it is needed. And, no matter how in love we are, we all need that from time to time.
